How to Deal with Negative Thoughts

Have you ever felt like you are consumed by negative thoughts that just keep ticking over and over in your mind despite your best efforts to move on from them?


In Buddhism, it is referred to as ‘the monkey mind’ because it behaves in a mischievous, restless way. This is a common thing for the mind to do, although most people are not usually aware of it.


When someone starts to become more conscious, they become more aware, not only of the way their mind goes over and over things, but of the quality of their thoughts and whether they are negative or positive.


The mind likes resolution, so it will keep going over and over a situation trying to find a solution. This is especially so when someone is caught up in a situation that feels like it is out of their control.


But there is one thing the mind has trouble understanding. No matter how much energy we put into a situation, no matter what strategy we come up with, we can’t control other people’s thoughts and actions. We will never be able to, but the mind uses up a lot of energy trying to do just that.


The only thing we can control is what we manifest in our lives and how we react to a situation. And when we react from a conscious place, it can be transformational.


You see, there are no coincidences in this world. As hard as it can be sometimes, there is always a reason why we find ourselves in a certain situation or relationship.


We get two choices. We can seek a deeper meaning and let it set us free or we can be victims and let the situation imprison us. By asking ourselves, ‘what would love want us to learn from this situation’, we are opening up to the possibility of a deeper teaching and asking to be shown what we need to see.


Then we can transform the situation and release it so that it doesn’t become a source of negative thoughts.


It is important for me to say that all people still need to hold personal responsibility for the part they play in any situation, but when we let go, it helps them to do the same too. So by healing yourself you are allowing them room for healing too.



You are always manifesting. You are either doing it consciously or unconsciously, but you are always manifesting. Because the mind doesn’t know the difference between reality and imagination, the thoughts you are focusing on, especially when there is an emotion attached, are helping to shape your future as much as the actions you take. This is what makes manifestation so powerful.


No-one consciously wants to manifest negative things in their lives but if you are not conscious of your negative thoughts, you will be manifesting more of the same into your life. They might not be exactly the same, but the manifestation will be of a similar theme and vibration or will trigger the same fears in you.


When we catch our negative thoughts, we can consciously choose another thought instead. By using our imaginations and emotions, we can change a situation through the power of manifestation and take back control of our lives.

“Where focus goes, energy flows.”

Tony Robbins



The more we can meditate and have moments of mindfulness throughout our day, the more we will become conscious of our thoughts. Mindfulness can also help us experience a space between ourselves and our emotions or circumstances. This space gives us room to know that we are not the emotions and circumstances of our lives. These will pass and our essence will alway remain the same.


Mindfulness is something that happens in the present moment. When the mind wanders, it is ALWAYS taking you away from the present moment and away from your power. The mind resides in the past or the present. Next time you catch yourself getting lost in thought, take notice of where you have gone. Were you back in the past going over things, or in the future thinking about things that will probably never happen?



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When we are upset about things, it is because we feel that we have been wronged. And although this can feel very real, it is an illusion, because the truth is that this is simply not possible. Our true selves, that is our soul, transcends this physical plane.


Everything else is a temporary. The ego uses these things to identify itself through the world around it, eg. ‘my body’, ‘my work’ and ‘my relationship’. (These things are still valuable in this world and need to be respected and cared for, but they are still separate to your true identity.)


The ego loves being wronged. It loves the drama, the attachment, and it loves telling everyone else about it. Recognising that it is the ego that is getting caught up in a situation, can sometimes be enough to help us move our mind on from a situation.


And sometimes despite knowing this, it can still be a little tricky to move on.


If you are getting really stuck and having difficulty moving on, I highly recommend doing some tapping or Emotional Freedom Technique (EFT). It is a quick and effective way to get you out of a negative thinking cycle. I personally this technique a lot because I find it so effective.


There are no coincidences. The fact that you have found your way to this blog post is a sign that you are aligning yourself with growth, healing and being more conscious, so take a moment to acknowledge that.

Have you ever had a time when you are able to transform a relationship by seeing it with love? Leave them in the comments below, or follow the conversation on Instagram.



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